From the series: The Upside of the Downside
When Life Pushes Harder Than You Expected
Welcome back to The Upside of the Downside.
Last time, in Episode 5, we talked about what it feels like to run on empty. This week, we move into something many of us know quietly but deeply: those moments when life pushes you harder than you expected.
There is an old American saying that goes, “Life doesn’t test you to break you, but to show you your strength.” I have been thinking about that lately, because life has a way of pressing on the exact places we thought were steady.
A few days ago, I watched a close friend go through something painful. Every year, they shared Thanksgiving with someone who had been part of their life for a long time. This year, a misunderstanding created distance. There were no big fights or dramatic endings. Just hurt feelings, mixed signals, and silence where warmth used to be.
Seeing that unfold reminded me how easily relationships can strain, and how quickly we can reach our emotional limits. Sometimes it is work. Sometimes it is family. Sometimes it is people we love but do not fully understand.
And in these moments, our minds can play tricks on us.
We replay conversations.
We analyze small things.
We start guessing intentions.
We wonder what we could have done differently.
But here is the truth I keep coming back to: most misunderstandings are softer than they feel. Over time, what looked huge becomes small. What felt sharp becomes gentle. And what seemed like an ending often becomes an opening.
This Thanksgiving, many of us may have had a moment that made us pause. Maybe it was tension with someone close. Maybe it was a small disappointment. Maybe it was loneliness when you expected connection.
Whatever it was, you are not alone in feeling it.
The season can be a quiet reminder that relationships, like life, are imperfect. People carry their own stories, their own pressures, their own fears. And sometimes the kindest thing we can do is to give space, soften our assumptions, and keep our hearts open to the possibility of repair.
I was reminded of something beautiful in the Book of Forgiving by Desmond Tutu and Mpho Tutu. They write about how healing begins not with confrontation, but with understanding. Not with fixing, but with listening. And sometimes, the first step is simply allowing ourselves to see the situation with a gentler heart.
Here are two reflections you might carry with you this week:
• When was a time you felt pushed to your limit, yet found strength you didn’t expect?
• Is there someone or something in your life that deserves a softer interpretation, maybe even a second look?
This is our sixth episode in The Upside of the Downside, and I hope it has brought something steady to your days. We will continue this series, because life always has more to teach, more to explore, and more to uncover together.
Until then, take care of your heart. And if this Thanksgiving brought a complicated moment, let it be a stepping stone, not a weight.
Warm Wishes
